Slug War

As my first real post, I feel it's quite appropriate to address my battle with the slugs of our yard. You see, I'm quite tolerant of most of the assorted garden pests that visit my little patch of green. When aphids visit, I just brush them off and move on. When caterpillars appear and devour my dill and fennel down to nubs, I simply plant more so that there's enough for all. Until now, the only real casualty of my gardening impulses has been a single black widow spider who too up residence (for some inexplicable reason, since I think they usually prefer darker, out-of-the-way areas) in the edging next to the radishes, and I only squashed her because I was afraid that some unwary housemate might decide to putter around in the garden (as I have repeatedly invited them) and get bitten.

But now a war is on and I feel no guilt. The house I'm renting is apparently the location of some mystical confluence that draws slugs to an unwholesome degree. I have never seen so many slugs in my whole life. They are absolutely everywhere. I'm afraid to walk outside barefoot after dark for fear I'll get slimed. And these slugs are voracious. They've been munching on plants I would never have suspected. Sure, they're avoiding the Lilies of the Valley (what with them being toxic and all), but they nearly killed my fennel earlier this spring.

The current list of slug casualties is as follows:

• Fennel (was left alone after the initial blitzkreig)
• Broccoli (RIP)
• Bush Beans (not sure whether they'll make it or not)
• Zucchini and Yellow Squash (most of the seedlings are toughing it out)
• Sweet Peas (there's been a fairly heavy death rate, but i planted bunches, so I'll be okay)
  
• Lovage (at least I think it was the damn slugs)
• Shelling Peas (most of the plants have recovered and have outpaced the slugs' hunger)
  
• Marigolds (wtf?! I thought nothing would eat marigolds, making them ideal residents for the edge of the garden. The slugs killed the first batch of marigolds and I'm waiting to see whether the ones I put in a couple days ago will be similarly targeted. In the photo to the right, you can see a denuded marigold next to a new one. Stupid slugs.)

Ugh. Taleisha and I have initiated a sort of passive-aggressive , low-tech warfare against the slugs. We've been setting beer traps for the little bastards whenever we remember and the morning results are generally disgustingly satisfactory. Also, the beer is disgusting and no one in the house will drink it, so at least it's going to a good cause.

My slug-hatred finally reached new and vaguely disturbing heights a few days ago when, during a damp, rainy night, I noticed that there were slugs on the outside of my bedroom window. While not usually a squeamish girly-girl, I found this completely unacceptable and worthy of a quiet moan of disgust. So, mindful of the possibilities of slug slime between my toes, I popped shoes on, grabbed a big cannister of Mortons and went forth to do battle.

Yeah, so it wasn't just the outside of my window where the things were congregating. The task of salting what turned out to be a veritable festival of oozing slugginess was complicated only slightly by the vertical surfaces that many of the slugs decided to climb. I spent a good 20 minutes out there flinging little handfuls of salt at our glass windows, brick walls, concrete foundations, aluminum porch siding, window screens and various other surfaces.

I'd forgotten how satisfying it is to salt slugs.

So I've just now finished re-baiting the slug traps (read: teacup saucers full of cheap, flat beer) and am heading to bed to nurse my headcold and dream of the delightful piles of ooze I'll be emptying from the saucers in the morning.

Morning Edit: Yup. Got some slugs. To the left is a photo of one of the traps, nestled at the base of some sugar snap pea vines. Ha! Take that, slugs!